My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize