Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I really don't understand how I cannot figure out how to work a fucking can opener when I'm hungover. Yet I still retained the ability to take a perfectly symmetrical picture of my erect penis and send it to every person in Matt's contacts the night before.
bring money and cleavage
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
