when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
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