Jerry, you need to find god
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize