If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
high people should be assigned attendants
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.