Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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