I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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