i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize