And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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