I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
