is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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