we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
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