used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
