Sponge bath it is.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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