Nicole vs. Life
well you can't waste a boner
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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