They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
