You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
