You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
honey bunches of taint.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize