imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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