I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
I'm not inviting you over anymore if my cat keeps ending up in the freezer...
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Randomize
