why didn't you poke me back
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
I just blew my weed a kiss
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
