Where did you get a picture of my penis
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Did I show you my penis last night?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
