i will never coherently bang her
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
