did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize