remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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