How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Randomize
