I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
