you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Rumble strips road head = magical
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Randomize
