Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
she told me i tasted like america
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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