Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Randomize
