thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Randomize