terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
