I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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