Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
