Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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