well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
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