i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
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