i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
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