Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
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youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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