I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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