fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize