Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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