his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
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Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
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On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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