Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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