I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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