he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
