He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
