I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
