there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
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