You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
