are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
Randomize
