About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
